Happy the new challange and high hope year, 2019!

The calendar new year always begins with a lot of new things - new ideas, new resolutions, new habits, new tries and new directions of life, and so on. All of what we want to control - we write down as a to-do list. In the air high hopes flies, we want to fulfil each new thing crossing it out with our black pens from the list, eventually. And the rest what we can't control we don't write down, we let that stay in the back of our minds.

We don't speak about them, but mindfully think and wish "hope it does not happen", or some even don't think those things are needed to write down. Maybe because we must be careful what we wish for. If I wish for "learn to forgive with love", then I already have invited an absurd situation to come into my life and experience it, hopefully remembering that it's just a lesson and do what I wished for. It has happened to me many times.

This year I want to remember the lessons I had learnt and sometimes neglect them.

"To protect my energy, it's okay to change my mind,

to cancel a commitment, to take a day off, to not answer that call/message, to not overshare me, to do nothing. It's okay to be alone, to sleep in, move on, to let go and it's okay to change. To protect my energy it's okay to not attend an event where you feel unwelcomed, it's okay to not be polite all the time. To protect yourself, it's okay to speak up."

But on my list of "in 2019 I want..." lays words as "conquer my fears, return to the person I was before all this happened, read my motivational letters from 2013, start living again. Just because "that happened", does not mean there is no hope. Once I was fearless, brave and inspiration to many. Now the "old me", is an inspiration to current me. Is that narcissistic to find inspiration within myself? Well, I am the only person who knows myself the best and everything I have never shared with anyone. I guess we all kind of should now and then compare ourselves from then and now, and either be proud or "make proud the younger me now, let's be strong".

I want to be more with people who see deeply and also are "it's okay to feel deeply, to be more emotional and simply just feel" type. Everyone should appreciate having in their lives someone who's so true that can't hide negative emotions. Negative emotions don't mean they are negative people, they simply see and feel more and are not afraid of exploring emotions. If not understand it, study, research, read, learn more about the complexity of the emotional world. I want to see more emotional intelligence in society in 2019, which will grow more into The great 20s of the 21st century. 

Love&Light with you.

Thank you!

May the love and light be with you!

@elinanomad